I have a calibrated and a true airspeed though.'. Click To Enlarge. However, just five minutes later, when the Air Traffic Controller (ATC) requested confirmation of turn direction, the pilot responded: 'Which way did you tell us to turn?'. One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. Do you have any documentation from LGA during World War II when a back up tower was put at 43--55 Robinson St. Flushing NY 11357. in the upstairs bedroom of Dave Meshirer, In case LGA was damaged/bombed. The following are accounts of actual exchanges between pilots and ATC from around the world: While taxiing at LaGuardia the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. Nobody wanted to engage the irate ground controller in her current state. Now, we have audio between pilots and air traffic controllers regarding an all-new sighting of what was at least loosely described as jetpack-wearing individual in the same general area. But it's not always the pilot who gives the worrying responses. They not only expect one to know one's gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. Winter storm kills 23 across the country and 3.5m freezing Texans STILL have no power: Gov. If you've ever wanted to know what pilots talk about behind the closed doors of the cockpit, you may want to think again. 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One pilot was said to have given his height instead of altitude, When the ATC asked one pilot if their plane was 'R-Nav equipped', they responded, 'What, are you kidding? By the way, after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway". Most radio exchanges between pilots and air traffic control are mundane; However, a handful shed light on just how many mistakes go on in the air 11.11.2014. We're lucky if we've got oil pressure! But I think its mostly true, if the personel was from around Frankfurt. Due to the nature of these stories, flight terminology below may not always be technically correct, and may also be edited or explained in parts for the benefit of non-aviation folk. When the ATC asked 'how long will it take you to climb to FL 600? TRENDING: DOJ Announcement … ', For another pilot, it was a matter of flying too many aircraft, as pilot64golfer revealed when he was asked what he was flying - 'Cessna 172. That landing wasn't the planes or the captains fault. Roger. From Zany Afandi (Aug 2017) One evening during the Month of Ramathan (Ramazan) where most Muslims fast during the day, I was about to start eating and drinking. While attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked, "What was your last known position? ", Ground: "Speedbird 206. Heated Exchange Between Pilot And Air Traffic Controller Caught On Tape. A DC-10 had an exceedingly long roll out after landing with his approach speed a little high. You CAN still book a summer holiday without losing out financially. The Frankfurt - Thing has to be quiet old. Speedbird 206: "Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway. ", Lufthansa (in English): "I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany. It was the asphalt". - Airline Pilot Central Forums, Tourists warned as Goa taxi protest turns violent, Parliament to debate cost of term-time holidays, New Brazil yoga retreats for World Cup widows, Outer Hebrides boasts stunning airport approach, Lewis Hamilton to star in Top Gear festival, Thailand set to lose £1.6bn in tourism revenue, 14% of Brits abroad refuse to speak local dialect, Egypt bombing: New FCO advice to UK tourists, India to cut red tape and issue visas on arrival, Qatar Airways' new all-business class flights, Rise in British travellers visiting Germany, Brits rate cuisine as essential part of holiday, London to Glasgow train to host comedy gig, Two-fifths of parents would risk term-time trip, Free prepaid MasterCard for your Euros or Dollars. good entertainment value, however the wrong airport referenced in the US AIR exchange. Student pilots give perhaps the most hapless of responses. I wish whoever posts these things would stop pretending they are real. No problem. Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f...ing bored, not f...ing stupid.". San Jose Tower: "American 751 heavy, turn right at the end of the runway, if able. _____ A Cessna inbound at the reporting point over ManlyBeach. Last updated by jack on 16 February, 2013 in Reading. The exchanges between nearby pilots and air traffic control regarding the unidentified aircraft were constant in the audio, with the same description coming back time … A report has been filed into an exchange between a British Airways pilot and an air traffic controller at Dublin Airport, the Irish Aviation Authority has said.. Delta Air Lines is investigating a terse exchange between one of its pilots and an air traffic controller when a plane was on the wrong taxiway at an Atlanta airport Friday morning. Another forum user wrote that when asked to state position and altitude, a lost student pilot replied, 'I am in the left seat, I am 5 feet, 11 inches'. People in first class where I was standing laughed for several minutes one passenger said to "I have not listened to those announcements for years but that was funny! The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. ", TWA 2341: "Center, we are at 35,000 feet. William Cody Bateman on 11 November, 2009, This was great, I was doing BELLY ROLLS.........Thanks, eyeflare travel & tips is © Jack Norell 1994-2021 All Rights Reserved. ', One pilot complained about the equipment - 'What, are you kidding? Laughed my ass of. Eastern 702: "Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. Make up your own mind whether this makes it more or less safe to fly with the comedians in the air. Being a pilot is fraught with hazards but sometimes exchanges between the pilot and ATC is very worrying. ", Tower: "Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on 124.". Kayla Hertz Gregg Abbot demands investigation into energy company that may not be able to restore heat for days, Part of the Daily Mail, The Mail on Sunday & Metro Media Group. Actual Exchanges Between Pilots And Control Towers. Advertisement - story continues below. What follows are some real life transcriptions of the occasionally funny exchanges between the air traffic controllers and pilots. Users of Airline Pilot Forums have been discussing the funniest things that they've heard over the radio in a thread that's been going strong since 2006. It'll take forever to sort this out! I am in the left seat, I am 5 feet 11 inches... 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Actual Exchanges Between Pilots And Control Towers. A Northwest Airlines flight was en route from Florida to New York when it was asked to turn 20 degrees right for spacing into the city. Please keep them coming. Air traffic controllers were in contact with the pilot, who ABC News has now identified as Richard Russell from Pierce County, during his flight. Ukrainian TV aired an exchange between air traffic control and a pilot who was landing as the jet crashed. Why must I speak English? See some funny announcements on airplanes. Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself ... listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206. 'A few years back, I was climbing out of PHX with approach control. You turned right on Delta! I know it's difficult for you to tell the difference between Cs and Ds, but get it right. The exchanges on Airline Pilot Forum revealed that many of the mistakes come from misunderstandings, Another time the Air Traffic Controller told a pilot to 'report 2 mile left base for runway 34 left'. ", Tower: "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?". Audio captured by LiveATC.net reveals the final exchanges between air traffic controllers and the pilot flying the Kobe Bryant helicopter that crashed. ), Inside one of Spain's most beautiful villages (officially) - and how the hard work of a Scottish expat helped to put it on the map, Exclusive for Mail on Sunday readers: Discover vibrant Venice with TV's Sherrie Hewson, A city that will leave you feeling smiles better: Copenhagen's feelgood factor hits you the moment you arrive, Pictured: The incredible Frank Gehry building-block-style skyscrapers set to transform the Toronto skyline, Banking on camping: Social distancing? Assumptions can be equally hazardous, as a post shared by Joel Payne shows. Exchanges between pilots and control towers (OLD ONE BUT ALWAYS FUNNY TO READ AGAIN) _____ Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!" Some pilots are surprisingly cavalier. Thank you. Those data exchanges range from weather messages and clearance for departures, to operational data for an airport, and to the digital exchanges between air traffic controllers and pilots of non-urgent messages as an alternative to voice communications. As well as anecdotes from days gone by and legends passed down from captains to co-pilots, there are a handful of exchanges detailing close calls, mistakes and everything in between. Did you copy that report from Eastern 702? ', A confused ATC requested a repeat to which the Learjet pilot responded, 'Oh, you mean my visa card number isn't going to help speed this up?'. 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Head for these northern delights (when you can finally travel): The Nordic islands offer everything from polar bears to Scandi chic - and there are more than 200,000 to choose from! I haveno idea where he is going!'. Did you make it all by yourself? For example, if an air traffic controller tells a pilot to turn on taxiway 3C, it would be relayed as Three Charlie. Although their tasks are rather serious due to the sensitive nature of air safety, once in a while, even they get to have a little fun at work. ', the pilot responded over the intercom that he actually wanted to 'descend to FL 600'. I've got the little Fokker in sight. Been feeling a bit low this week Man United got knocked out of the European cup but this article cheered me up thanks Keith Ashton under lyne, I am SO gald I haven't got a flight booked .... but brilliant - made me laugh, "On tour" by James Nixon is well worth a read. Delta Airlines is investigating a heated exchange between one of their pilots and an air traffic controller. ", same flight same girl same reading, "there is no smoking on this XYZ MD88 but I being a smoker know that 3 hours can be a long time to go with out a smoke if you would like to step out on the wing and if you can get that joker to light up have at it". Availability? LGA - LaGuardia / LGW - Gatwick, After making a hard landing the stewardess came on the intercom and said, "Sorry about that ladies and gentlemen. An extraordinary exchange caught on tape between an air traffic controller and a pilot. Im not sure I believe all of these are true, but that doesn't stop it from being funny like hell. The 'Groundhog Day B&B' is a real-life 'gem' of a rental you can book through Airbnb from $170 a night (6am wake-up call not mandatory), Brexit visa rules for Tenerife, insurance refund complaints and tips for trips to South-East Asia: The Holiday Guru helps out travellers with expert advice, Checking in... Singer Bonnie Tyler talks about the time she chatted with Mariah Carey over a glass of fizz on a plane and her favourite part of Wales. ", Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): "Because you lost the bloody war!". Sometimes you don't', A pilot was asked to state his intentions, he gave an aspirational response of: 'I want to be a private pilot.'. Shocking audio of a heated exchange between a Delta pilot and an air traffic controller has flyers wondering just who's in charge of keeping them safe during air travel. You've got it. Another landing like yours and I'll have enough parts for another one.". The first one is true and the ATC was an American. I heard approach issue a clearance to a Gulfstream to climb to FL230. What follows are some real life transcriptions of the occasionally funny exchanges between the air traffic controllers and pilots. And then there are times when it's the ATC who's behind the antics. Air traffic service. We're lucky if we've got oil pressure!'. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Climb and maintain.....Hey, don't you touch that, don't you ever touch that again... Can you help me find a new co-pilot? U.S. Marine Fighter Pilot Chats with Iranian Air Defense Radar Patriot Room ^ | 2009-04-06 | Scott Martin Posted on 04/10/2009 12:45:50 PM PDT by SkyDancer. Now can I go? A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight. Looking for more fun? Thanks Keith, really happy I could cheer someone up! Heated Exchange Between Pilot & Air Traffic Controller Leads To Investigation July 29, 2014, 10:10 AM Delta Airlines has launched an investigation after a heated exchange between a pilot and an air traffic controller was released. Learner pilots can be particularly hapless. Climb and maintain... Hey, don't you touch that, don't you ever touch that again". Loved these hilarious comebacks. There are posts that just make you wonder. The Holiday Guru offers advice for holidaymakers and this week looks at whether a 'vaccine passport' will be brought in for trips to Greece, Grounded! How much noise can we make up here? ", Student: "When I was number one for takeoff. Irish air traffic controller orders British Airways jet off the runway (AUDIO) Listen to the feisty exchange between an irate controller and a British pilot. By TFPP Writer Published March 22, 2015 at 5:01pm Share on Facebook Tweet Share Email Print. I know a polit who heard it first hand. The pilot of the Learjet allegedly said: 'Lear N____ has some info for ya: 5839...2834...2804...3823 Expiration 10/09. Firm offers cabin upgrades that include covering the walls in giant OLED screens that display movies and landscapes, Had my jab. While taxiing at NY La Guardia, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. We have digital watches! While on a MD88 a fellow crew member was reading the safety announcements and when she got to the Seat belt portion and in her cute little southern accent she said "In case any of you have not been in a car since the early 1950's this is a seat belt and we will now demonstrate for you how to use it. A British seaside holiday under canvas could be your best bet this summer, Your flexible travel friends! ", The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: "I made it out of DC-8 parts. You got that, US Air 2771?". Article by tickld. Sorry that's my other airplane.'. 'The gulfstream captain came back and said, "Roger. We are no longer accepting comments on this article. I heard the Fort Lauderdale Executive Airport tower ask a Jet that was having trouble finding the Airport if he was a real pilot. Airline Pilot Central central forum highlights some of the most hilarious interactions overheard by other pilots on the frequency.They asked the question, “What’s the funniest thing you have ever heard over the radio?” The thread highlights miscommunications and jokes between pilots and air traffic control that might leave you wondering how safe you really are in the air. ", Continental 635: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern and we've already notified our caterers....", O'Hare Approach Control: "United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o'clock, three miles, eastbound. User kerns_bbo posted a series of exchanges between a Learjet and ATC during a period of long queues. Occasionally, some of the conversations are more than just a little worrying and might make you think twice about boarding a plane. We have digital watches!" * A generic term meaning variously, flight information service, alerting service, air traffic advisory service, air traffic control service (area control service, approach control service or aerodrome control service). These really cheered me up, thanks folks! The exchange begins with a pilot making a simple request of 'FL 600'. Stop right there. The first one is'nt true unless she was an American ground controller, Engish people do not use the expression "screwed up" or "you got that" still funny though. I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! Then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking: "Wasn't I married to you once?". Naturally the ground control frequency went terribly quiet after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Definitely made me smile. A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start clearance in Munich, overheard the following: Lufthansa (in German): "Ground, what is our start clearance time? Good evening tower, this is Northwest XXX in delta colours, just so you know. Gotta be highly intelligent to think that fast with humor. Germans,Amaricans,and british people working at airports mix well. I am currently in flight training at the university of north Dakota, I have heard exchanges like the one from the lost student pilot all the time, this article is perfect. A pilot and an air traffic controller argue over landing on a closed runway after the pilot declared a fuel emergency. ", Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I'm looking up our gate location now. On the opposite end of the scale, some planes are visibly under-equipped. These are hilarious! A Delta Air Lines pilot who dumped jet fuel over elementary-school children in Los Angeles on Tuesday told air-traffic control moments beforehand that he wasn't going to do it.. Radio transcripts of exchanges between Delta Flight 89 and controllers at Los Angeles International Airport, known as LAX, show the pilot being asked whether he needed to dump fuel, to which he replied "negative." Tension in every cockpit at LGA was running high. ', 'The controller asked if everything was alright and if he could provide any assistance. ', But it's jweinerbu's post that you definitely never want to hear over the intercom - 'All aircraft, be advised, earthquake in progress.'. Modernizing air traffic control a crucial part of America's security ... feeding data automatically into flight computers instead of being manually input after radio exchanges between pilots … 51. ", Tower: "TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees. The manual offers greater detail, helpful illustrations, a glossary of phrases and aviation terms, standard radio procedures, and examples of common communication exchanges between pilots and air traffic control. Many of the mistakes come from misunderstandings and language barriers. An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: "US Air 2771, where the hell are you going? Tower (Female voice): "Cessna WYXD, congestion at airport approach. The comments below have not been moderated. Same way of responding, usually with a minimum of words. Best and Funniest Air Traffic Control Conversations - YouTube ANSPs must be capable of managing efficient, reliable and clear digital data exchanges with aircraft pilots. More information... People also love these ideas Frommer's top 12 destinations for 2009Touring the German AutobahnNo fees means cheaper flights for youGreat reads #15, The following HTML is allowed:
. It's all about getting to grips with the small print, It's not all beer halls and autobahns: Jaw-dropping photographs of Germany's breathtaking mountainous landscapes, Virtual tours by professional guides are the new frontier of travel - and here are some of the UK's best, from one that roams London's East End to an exploration of beautiful Bath, Waking in the wilderness: Why writer SIMON BARNES is dreaming of Chikoko River in Zambia during lockdown, Will passenger plane windows become obsolete? Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.". I really need a good laugh today, as my flight (to my wedding reception) likely to be cancelled tomorrow with the icelandic volcano plumes halting all UK flights. The Last One Is Gold. You stay right there and don't move till I tell you to! The views expressed in the contents above are those of our users and do not necessarily reflect the views of MailOnline. The pilot responded with, 'Roger, do you want nautical or statute miles? Never mind, you're always the same damn green dot on my screen. ", Delta 351: "Give us another hint! My son is a pilot. ", Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944 but it was dark and I didn't land". Actual Exchanges Between Pilots And Air Traffic Control February 21, 2016 By Edward Pizzarello 2 Comments There’s a core group of United Airlines frequent fliers I know who crave Channel 9, the live broadcast of air traffic control they offer on some of their planes. ", Continuing her tirade to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: "God, you've screwed everything up! Sometimes you don't. A pilot asked ATC 'how do you read', he received a cheeky response of 'Left to right, top to bottom, how about you? Tower: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on 124. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign "Speedbird 206". Welcome to Hotel Quarantine: Inside the $80-a-night Ibis where arrivals into Heathrow from 33 'red list' countries will have to spend ten days in Covid isolation - without leaving their rooms - for $2,600, Powerful 'Covid O' Cabinet committee is set to consider plans for 'vaccine passports' tomorrow amid hopes they could save summer holidays. Now, a series of hilarious exchanges between pilots and control towers are going viral. You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour and I want you to do exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
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